Episode One:

The Oral Fixation Summation

"You're so working class I can't believe I've ever let you inside of me"

 

Neither Jon nor Alice feels like they are getting enough and the frustration is tangible. If the other canít help then who can? Best friends? Colleagues? The corner shop/kebab house owner? 

 

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Episode Two:

The Past/Present Predicament

"I remember when we used to have a life and not just a "Lovefilm" account"

 

Jon and Aliceís latest dinner party attempt results in some guests glad to get away. Alice is nostalgic for the past, but realises some things have always been the sameÖ

 

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Episode Three:

The Future Mother-in-Law Dichotomy

"Why did we have to let her in? Could we not have just posted her a duvet through the letter-box?"

 

Aliceís Mum comes to stay and Jon is not happy. A house-proud woman with a bosom as pronounced as her carefully annunciated consonants, she cleans, criticises, pokes and potters until not even Alice can take it anymore, forcing her to call on reinforcements with equally masterful diction.

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Episode Four:

The Competition Mission Impasse

"That's the last time I take the moral high ground. hate the view from there."

 

A bitter round of Pictionary ends in a drink-to-the-vomit drinking game after Alice claims she can beat Jon at anything. The rug of Alice and Jonís host gets in the firing line, rekindling rivalries from the past as well as the present. Jon declares he is not a loser and embarks on a mission to prove it by any means possible.

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Episode Five:

The Big Night Out Debacle

"The dangling testicles of fate have tea-bagged me yet again."

 

Alice and Keren are coming to the end of the three-hour getting ready ritual, in preparation for a rare big night out with old mates.  Jon is trying his best to get out of it with the help of the not-so-bright Grub. As the countdown begins, the wine is drunk, the hair sprayed stiff and Jon made to change his shirt, but who will make it out of the house in time?

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Episode Six:

The Saga Revelations

"I've never known a children's book with so many overt revelations to clitori."

 

Alice gets her one client, Camp Raymond, a career-boosting gig reading his bestselling childrenís novel on tape, leaving Jon at home to clean the house (with a little help from his sci-fi fan friends). While Jon is embroiled in an all day Star Wars marathon, Alice battles with Camp Raymondís expressive eccentricities to distract her from wondering where her life is going.

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Episode Seven:

The Wake-Up Call

"God, I need to be bereaved. I could do with losing a few pounds" 

 

Jon, Keren and Grub accompany Alice to the funeral of a uni friend called Boris. Jon wants to know how good a friend the deceased was; Alice wants to know how he died. Will their respective quests for knowledge end in tears or laughter? 

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